Local Republican city councilman Dan Boyds says that the hysteria over coronavirus really needs to settle down, especially since the virus hasn’t killed “an appreciable number of [his] own friends.”
Boyds says that he thinks that the death toll is overstated. Last week a man got “gobbled by a shark, and it was COVID death,” he said, which he found “kinda suspicious, honestly.”
When queried as to whether or not he believes in conspiracy theories, he quickly said that he doesn’t. As a local doctor of homeopathy, he’s very science-minded. “Conspiracy theories aren’t a thing,” he chided reporters. “They’re conspiracy hypotheses, because they won’t let us test them.”
He did list a number of very persuasive conspiracy hypotheses which he believes on balance are more likely true than false, such as: the World Trade Centers were bombed by the government, airplanes produce chemtrails to control the masses, the moon landing was faked, and the earth absolutely isn’t round. Additionally, while not a theory or hypothesis, he said it’s a known fact that essential oils cure cancer while vaccines cause it.