Reading Time: < 1 minute A 32-year old Portland man was arrested and released Saturday after a peaceful demonstration against spaghetti for dinner resulted in the hospitalization of his wife.
Reading Time: 2 minutes George Soros has promised to have the building demolished if the protestors can’t manage it, though he says he’s been rethinking his tactic of leaving pallets of bricks everywhere, which “seem to just be making it bigger.”
Reading Time: 2 minutes “The call to remove our beautiful law enforcement agencies, which are the best in the world, and maybe the best that has been, even ever, is not just a tragedy, but an outrage. I have been telling local, state, and federal officials that they need to dominate the streets, and now they will. Starting now, AT-ATs will be supplied to all law enforcement agencies nationwide. That is all.”
Reading Time: 7 minutes In essence, idea laundering works through systemic infiltration of ideological malfeasance in the peer-review process. The grievance studies showed how this works, so I won’t go into too much detail (all the professors involved are liberal; Dr. Boghossian wrote “A Manual for Creating Atheists, so their worldview is humanist), but I’ll break it down a bit.
Reading Time: 2 minutes He left his house to take a walk and clear his mind, but found that dogs were forming into packs in the streets, and all the trees were covered in murders of crows as far as his eyes could see.
Reading Time: 2 minutes In a statement, Joe Biden stated that he supports the rage that people are feeling. “Look, look, I felt that way once, I did. I hear you. I, I, I used a chain, a chain on CornPop, after telling him that I was going to, ‘Look, gonna come up there and yank you off.’ So, like I was saying, two stones with one bird here, we kill the mob and get justice for the virus.”
Reading Time: 2 minutes Most of the astronauts were pretty bummed to be stuck in space, as they heard that people at the protests were getting absolute bargains from local stores, no coupons required!