The Soul-Shattering Sound of Silence

The Soul-Shattering Sound of Silence

Reading Time: 2 minutes It is hard to be thankful for pain when you consider all the moments you got to hold you kid and listen to her floating laugh echoing in the halls, which now ring only with the high-pitched, tinny whine that your ears pick up when there is only silence. It’s hard to be thankful for the times your mom cooked you your favorite dinner as you stand in the kitchen, now empty forever, helping load boxes of items you have to do, well, something with. It’s hard to be thankful for the pain as you tell your best friend and confidant, “I finally got rid of his toothbrush today. I guess this makes it real.”

Love and Respect

Love and Respect

Reading Time: 2 minutes “I just want to be loved and valued. I want to be number one in his life. Unconditional love…that’s what I want.” We understand this. She needs his love. She needs love when she’s firing on all cylinders, and she needs it even more when she’s worn down—the kids are going full-barbarian, the water heater’s out, and the stir-fry dinner just got complicated by a lack of rice. “I need…

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An Invulnerable Christian Man

An Invulnerable Christian Man

Reading Time: 2 minutes One of my friends told me how she was concerned that I wasn’t vulnerable. We listened to Brene Brown’s “The Power of Vulnerability” together so that I could understand her better.

In Your Moment of Despair, Here’s Why I Know You’re Important

In Your Moment of Despair, Here’s Why I Know You’re Important

Reading Time: 4 minutes Have you ever felt beaten down? Felt like the non-stop waves of defeat and distress have just crushed out hope? Maybe you’ve staggered on because the only other option is not even tenable, but you feel as if hope has been crushed out by unyielding despair.

When Forgiveness Feels Like a Last Resort

When Forgiveness Feels Like a Last Resort

Reading Time: 2 minutes Jesus stressed the importance of forgiveness when he remarked, “And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.”

Kayaking String Lake in June
You Do Not Love out of Weakness, but out of Strength

You Do Not Love out of Weakness, but out of Strength

Reading Time: 2 minutes There are things that I am not comfortable talking about. They’re not who I see myself as being, and they’re not things that I’m in touch with…yet these things which make me want to glance away, to pretend that they’re not there, they are what make me who I am.  Your friend told you, “There is nice and there is naive. You’re on the naive side. Hurt so often.  Don’t…

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A Selfish Love

A Selfish Love

Reading Time: < 1 minute If you have never read CS Lewis’ book, “The Four Loves,”go and buy it immediately. There is a selfish love in humanity which is no love at all—”If I can’t have you, no one will.”  Or perhaps, “If I can’t be happy, I’ll make sure that you aren’t, either.” Contrast this “love” with appreciative love. “Appreciative love gazes and holds its breath and is silent, rejoices that such a wonder should…

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Becoming the Greatest Good [Guest Post]

Becoming the Greatest Good [Guest Post]

Reading Time: 3 minutes This is a guest post from Temitayo Adebisi Adekunle, a Nigerian-born microbiologist. Look at the beginning of verse 1: “Therefore be imitators of God.” The goal of the Christian life is perfect imitation of God. The apostle John said that one day, “we shall be like him, because we shall see him as he is.” So, really, the whole of the Christian life is summed up right here: be imitators…

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love on the beach oxytocin overlay banner chemical structure of love
Dr. Love-is-a-Superstition or: There is No Such Thing as You

Dr. Love-is-a-Superstition or: There is No Such Thing as You

Reading Time: 3 minutes They don’t believe that there is an immaterial soul which exercises causal power on material reality. All that you are, therefore, is your body (including your brain). Since the brain, as a physical object, follows the laws of physics and chemistry, then your thoughts/decisions must also follow the laws of physics and chemistry.

Don’t Use People As Bandages to be Discarded

Don’t Use People As Bandages to be Discarded

Reading Time: 2 minutes I’d been hurt, so I “needed” to bandage those wounds. And with this person, I’d found my bandage, but as a mere tool. Something to be taken off and discarded at a later date. And that’s what I did.

My Friends Are Like Southwest Airlines

My Friends Are Like Southwest Airlines

Reading Time: < 1 minute “Southwest Airlines is successful because the company understands it’s a customer service company. It also happens to be an airline.”
—Harvey Mackay

The Pornography of Butterflies and Terry Crews

The Pornography of Butterflies and Terry Crews

Reading Time: 3 minutes Two researchers, Dr. Nikolaas Tinbergen and Dr. D. Magnus, played a trick on butterflies.  After figuring out which marks on female butterfly wings were most eye-catching to their mates, they created their own cardboard butterflies and painted them to look like super-females. Their wing patterns were based on the wings of normal butterflies, but with more exciting marks than would ever be found in nature. And the butterflies fell for…

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Camp above Loomis Lake, Wyoming.
You Can’t Awaken Someone Who Is Pretending to Be Asleep.

You Can’t Awaken Someone Who Is Pretending to Be Asleep.

Reading Time: 3 minutes You can’t awaken someone who is pretending to be asleep. You also cannot have reciprocated love with someone who is only pretending to feel. Throughout my life, I’ve often found myself wishing that I were a robot, so that I wouldn’t have emotions—I was always impressed by Data in the regard. That wasn’t possible, but I created a facsimile of it, wherein I blocked off letting myself feel connected to…

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Lucas Necessary in Cloud Peak Wilderness at night. Lost Twin Lakes, WY.
My Life: A Story of Failure; A Hope of Success

My Life: A Story of Failure; A Hope of Success

Reading Time: 14 minutes Note: This is an older post with valuable information. I now am developing a happy familia. ⇢ Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Your Pandora’s Box In a previous article, I noted that much of my failure in communication has ultimately come down to effort. Because I have not put in the time and effort required to build relationships, my overall success in conveying information and having successful relationships has been very…

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A Failure to Communicate: The Story of My Life?

A Failure to Communicate: The Story of My Life?

Reading Time: 4 minutes “Simplifying important but complex messages can be a necessary and valuable approach for increasing the reach of those messages. But when simplification renders the message inaccurate, the mission is harmed.” —Dr. Heather E. Heying  While I was on a quick, 24-mile hike with an acquaintance, she commented that I would talk about things which “made no sense.” While they made plenty of sense to me, and I was conveying correct…

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Darla’s Talk about Love

Darla’s Talk about Love

Reading Time: 2 minutes I was talking with my wonderful coworker Darla once, and she had some good advice about love and choosing the right person. Darla told me a story that I’d like to share with you below: A student asked his professor, “What is love?” The teacher said, “In order to answer your question, go to a wheat field and choose the best stalk of wheat you can find. Pick the one…

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