Category: Science, Philosophy, and More

Until Dawn Do Us Part

Lucas Necessary

Reading Time: < 1 minuteUntil-dawn-do-us-part relationships make until-death-do-us-part ones so very hard. They exchange temporary happiness for permanent burdens. Years of memories that could have been shared instead become moribund recollections of “might have beens.” A wife of noble character who can find?She is worth far more than rubies. Proverbs 31:10 I can’t imagine myself finding a ruby and chucking it away. People die with integrity or despair, and the history of companionship goes…

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Supremes: Prisons Prohibited from Observing Daylight Saving Time, Violates Freedom from Cruel & Unusual Punishment

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Reading Time: < 1 minuteJustice Ruth Bader Ginsburg was the sole dissenting vote, writing with cutting disagreement that eliminating daylight savings time will “unfairly impede the ability of inmates to milk cows, pasture sheep, and attend to beaver slides.”

Physicians: Dementia Patients Should Be Supervised Around Sharp Objects; Nuclear Launch Codes

Lucas Necessary

Reading Time: < 1 minuteWhile he seems to have a bit of a stutter, it’s Biden’s “advanced hypermalignant superdementia” that has given the AGS some pause. James Cromwell, the head of the AGS, told reporters in a phone interview,

Trump Will Fight Off Coronovirus Using Bone Spurs (And Maybe Golf Clubs)

Lucas Necessary

Reading Time: < 1 minuteAddressing the press corps in the White House, the POTUS reminded people that bone spurs were invaluable in Vietnam. Although he couldn’t personally attend, he said that it still affected him: Agent Orange was in fact where he got the idea for his facial bronzing color.

Nervous: Biden Says Trump Not Responding Well to Breakbone Fever Epidemic

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Reading Time: < 1 minuteExiting the stage in his home state of Delaware, Mr. Biden refused to shake any hands, citing his worries about “catching the leprosy.”

Tyranny in the House of Mouse: Disney’s Role in Upholding the Gender Patriarchy

Lucas Necessary

Reading Time: 2 minutesDisney blatantly shoves Mulan back into the closet, and forces him to erase his clear signs of male identification so that he presents as female and marries a man. This narrative is harmful to all womxn and non-binary folx— Disney specifically targets young girls; an audience that is historically incapable of independent thought.

Bernie Snags Trump Vote by Offering Taxpayer-Subsidized Bronzer

Lucas Necessary

Reading Time: < 1 minuteAfter ending a bad night neck-and-neck with Joe Biden, Bernie Sanders found himself needing any vote he could possibly get—even Donald Trump’s!

Bernie Sanders Nervously Asks If There Will Be a Food Line for Him

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Reading Time: < 1 minute“Just if things don’t go well,” said Sanders, while nervously licking his lips, as his eyes darted hungrily at a Subway bag, though it was empty. “Do you suppose Joe, who I have always respected, will he have a bread line for me?”

Darn: Biden Wakes Up and Sees His Shadow, 6 More Months of Campaigning

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Reading Time: < 1 minuteBiden groggily stumbled to a nearby podium, where he promised that, if he’s elected, he’ll repeal the Jim Crow laws, but warned that he has a strong stance on Prohibition, as alcohol is a gateway drug.

trump banner excited for cheeseburgers from mcdonalds

Bernie Tempts Trump With Promise of Free Bread and McDonald’s Lines

Lucas Necessary

Reading Time: < 1 minuteThe website 538 says that there is a 98% chance that Donald Trump will vote for Bernie Sanders due to the ingenious move.

Relief: Combined Dem Candidate Age Now Only Stretches Back to Year 1712

Lucas Necessary

Reading Time: < 1 minuteAfter thoughtfully removing all of the young, colored candidates, the Democrats now have a strong field of rich, white septuagenarians, the perfect people to take on the current rich, white septuagenarian in the White House.

Opinion: Bernie Beat Male Life Expectancy, So He Can Beat Trump, Too!

Lucas Necessary

Reading Time: 2 minutesI, for one, was ecstatic when Bernie remarked,

“American journalists talk about how bad a country is because people are lining up for food. That’s a good thing! In other countries people don’t line up for food; the rich get the food and the poor starve.”

CNN: Trump Signs Unimportant Document with Group of Austere Religious Scholars

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Reading Time: < 1 minuteSanders commented,

“I don’t know much about that, but I know that the USSR, who had great public infrastructure, and who provided free meals to its citizens, they fought those people. So if you ask me, in my book, Cenk, pulling out of Afghanistan is the wrong idea.”

MSNBC: Trump-Taliban Peace Deal Will Cost Troops Jobs

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Reading Time: < 1 minuteDoha, Qatar—While the Trump administration tries to spin the peace deal with the Taliban as a good thing, MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow has pointed out that it’s another sign that Trump just doesn’t support the troops. “In the worst economy we’ve ever seen, Trump decides to end over 18 years of solid employment for our troops—what an idiot. How DARE this man end the all-expenses-paid vacations that we were giving our…

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CNN: Trump Administration Caught Working with Terrorists

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Reading Time: < 1 minuteMSNBC’s Rachel Maddow noted, “These people killed Americans, and now Trump’s working with them. Any person who voted for him should be shot.”

I’ve Avoided Relationships—Jesus Was Right, It’s Hurt Me

Lucas Necessary

Reading Time: 2 minutesFor most of my life, I’ve avoided any deep commitments. Here’s why that will always hurt you.

Democrat Researchers Discover 2 New Human Rights Every Day

Lucas Necessary

Reading Time: 2 minutesSanders pointed out we used to be a backward people in America, believing in only a few, paltry, civil liberties which were mostly useless—dumb things like “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness,” which did no one any real good.

Democratic Debate: $64 Billion Dollar Edition

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Reading Time: 2 minutesVermont Senator Bernie Sanders
Dislikes include: Cubans being wrong about their opinions on Cuba, having to scold vicious Bernie Bros; the Democratic party as a whole.

Likes include: Color TV, which came out when he was 12.

Personal slogan: “What can Red do for you?”

The Four Loves—Happy Valentine’s Day

Lucas Necessary

Reading Time: 2 minutesI can’t say that I naturally engage many people—one of my relationships started off with the other person stating that I seemed boring, and from our perspectives, that was an accurate assessment. There is nothing inherently wrong with someone finding you boring; people have different interests, and they might share little in common. The topics I love tend to have little appeal to most, and my personality is more than…

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E Pluribus Unum—A Christian Concept?

Lucas Necessary

Reading Time: 2 minutesE pluribus unum. Out of many, one. This is a Biblical concept found everywhere from Isaiah 66 to Romans 12. God takes people from all nations and peoples, no matter how unlikely, and makes them one in Christ, often to the surprise of those who currently see themselves as “the one true church.” Having only human eyes with which to see, we can certainly declare some things: people are known by their fruit, disciples…

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Church of Christ—Denomination or Not?

Lucas Necessary

Reading Time: 3 minutesI am a member of the Church of Christ. I’ve preached and helped out at a number of different assemblies, and I think that we are a denomination, sometimes for better and sometimes for worse, but we’re one that I’m pretty comfortable with, as often we have some solid, Biblical teaching. I’ve noticed that our beliefs can vary a bit, too. In one town, in the assembly, the women will…

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Oops! Trump Releases Re-Election Logo YEARS Too Early, and Bernie’s Angry!

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Reading Time: < 1 minuteThe Sanders campaign has expressed outrage, noting that while Sanders will definitely have kicked the bucket by 2024, it’s not acceptable for Trump to use such a logo, because it appropriates Bernie’s ideas.

In Exchange for Free College, Bernie Sanders Will Require Students to Serve 2 Years in Peace Corps or Antifa

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Reading Time: < 1 minuteSanders says he also plans to rename the United States to the “United States Socialist Republic,” as “USSR has a nice ring to it.”

DNC Places Hidden Trapdoor Under Bernie in Case He Gets Too Popular at Tonight’s Debate

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Reading Time: < 1 minuteNew Hampshire—Having failed to stop Bernie in Iowa, where they hired Shadow, Inc., and its subsidiary Clinton LLC, the Democratic National Committee has promised its constituents that they’re going to do better during tonight’s debate. While the debate will feature rigged questions designed to tear down the candidate, Plan is the rigged debate stage, which features a literal trapdoor under Bernie Sanders. A nearby DNC member has a kill-switch that…

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1 Healthy Question: If God Created the Universe, Who Created God?

Lucas Necessary

Reading Time: 13 minutesA timeless question that brilliant people have answered. Bonus discussion on actual infinites within spacetime.