Reading Time: 2 minutes Regardless of Biden and Harris’s landfall intensity, life-threatening highway stoppages and strong arson are likely over a large portion of the east coast, the west coast, and Chicago, as well as unsurvivable, rapidly-intensifying peaceful protests in Denver, CO and other metropolitan areas.
Reading Time: 2 minutes “Good evening vassals, and I see that the failing New York Times is here, so good evening traitors and peasants, too,” President Trump said.
Reading Time: 2 minutes Acknowledging that involvement increases investment, Joe Biden, running on the Harris-Biden ticket, has announced a plan to provide free college to all Americans—but there’s a catch.
Reading Time: < 1 minute Having just been selected to be Joe Biden’s running mate, newly-minted VP candidate Kamala Harris is being forced to walk back claims that she made last year.
Reading Time: < 1 minute Already anticipating a landslide victory just like they had with Hillary Clinton, the Democrats are busy preparing for a Biden administration.
Reading Time: 2 minutes Seeking to improve his credibility and rating with all age demographics, Democratic presidential candidate Joe Biden is releasing a new book, “Ridin’ with Biden: Mastering the Art of “Unwanted” Seduction—A Guide for All Ages.”
Reading Time: < 1 minute Here at Hiking in the Light, we believe that all choices are important, no matter how absolutely bleak they seem!
Reading Time: < 1 minute Candidate Joe Biden’s odd story about getting into a chain-fight with bad-boy pool Kraken CornPop came under fire today.
Reading Time: 2 minutes “Listen up, bucko,” he angrily remarked at the camera. “Who are you and what are you staring at?” An aide was fetched to change his Zoom screen, which he had accidentally set to show his own face.
Reading Time: < 1 minute After a grueling process of having to weed out 327,999,998 people better suited to running the most powerful nation in the world, the United States has finally narrowed the field down to the two people most likely to grab a woman by the genitals.
Reading Time: < 1 minute “I can’t promise to maintain the social distancing or whatever, not necessarily. How can I know if she’s the right one if I can’t, I can’t sniff those sweet hairs? Come’ere, honey,” he told the female debate moderator while trying to grab her by the shoulders.
Reading Time: < 1 minute A staffer for the Biden campaign accidentally removed the child-proofing door-handle cover to his room, and the candidate has subsequently been seen wandering the debate stage in his bubble, hours in advance of the actual curtain time. It’s expected to be his strongest performance of the night.
Reading Time: < 1 minute “My mind is sharper than a, a, you know the thing,” Biden said in a remark in the nation’s capital. “I don’t have any brain problems, I’m fiddle as a fit.”
Reading Time: < 1 minute At the time of this writing, Biden was seen asking an aide to short shares of Studebaker.
Reading Time: < 1 minute While he seems to have a bit of a stutter, it’s Biden’s “advanced hypermalignant superdementia” that has given the AGS some pause. James Cromwell, the head of the AGS, told reporters in a phone interview,
Reading Time: < 1 minute Exiting the stage in his home state of Delaware, Mr. Biden refused to shake any hands, citing his worries about “catching the leprosy.”